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Michael Ian Black is an actor, comedian, writer and director. At a recent stand-up gig, he confronted a heckler. Here is the story he tells.
It’s the late show on a Saturday night in Columbus, Ohio. I’m halfway through my set and I mention Barack Obama. Some scattered boos. Which is normal. Somebody always hates the president, no matter who that president might be. In this case, the president is Obama and I am a fan, so I always ask why they are so mad at him.
“Why are you mad at the president?”
Some common responses:
“Because he’s an idiot.”
“Because he doesn’t do anything.”
“Because he broke his campaign promises.”
That’s usually as far as people are able to go. They’re mad but they don’t know why. Which is always funny, at least to me. In fact, now that I think of it, nobody has ever given me a specific policy reason why they do not like our current president. I try to be polite about it while simultaneously making fun of them, then I give whoever I was making fun of a dollar, and we move on.
Last night, as I was talking about how much I love the president (because I do), somebody yelled out “Heil Hitler.”
Heil Hitler?
My immediate reaction was to crumple to the floor, which I did. I don’t know why, except that it seemed to me in that moment that the show had now gone south very quickly, and if bottles were going to be thrown, I didn’t want to get hit.
But then I stood up and asked the person (shrouded in darkness, as people who scream “Heil Hitler” often are) why he yelled that, thinking maybe he thought it was funny in some obtuse way, like maybe he though shouting that would be interpreted as clever satire. Or maybe he was being ironic. Grasping, I know, but I honestly had no idea why somebody would yell that outside of a Klan rally.
But I am still being polite.
The guy in the dark says, “Because when you say you like Obama, that’s the same thing to me as saying ‘Heil Hitler.’”
The audience, predictably, starts booing. I ask them to please calm down, that I will handle this in a mature way. While I am saying this to the audience, I am thinking, How do I possibly handle this in a mature way.
So the audience settles down, and I turn to the gentleman and say, “Sir, I say with this all due respect – you are a fucking moron.”
And then I kind of lost my shit.
I just started screaming at the guy. Screaming. I don’t even know what I was screaming, although the gist was, “How dare you compare Hitler to this president or any president? How dare you equate what he did with Obama is doing? Do you have any idea how insulting that is? Do you know anything about history? Do you have any idea what Hitler did? He killed six million of my people, which is six million more than Obama has killed. You’re a fucking idiot. You’re a fucking moron. You’re the fucking problem with this country. You and your reflexive retardation. You’re a fucking this-and-that…” and then I just basically started yelling “fuck” a lot at the guy. Fuck fuck fuck fuck.
Then he stood up and left.
It felt really, really great.
But now I feel bad. I feel bad because, in retrospect, that guy didn’t deserve that. Yes he said something incredibly stupid, but my response was just as stupid. I could have made my point a million different ways without screaming into a microphone in a room filled with drunk people. I wasn’t clever, I wasn’t thoughtful, I said nothing that would move the conversation forward. I just yelled because Nazis push my Jew button (my Jew button is located right below my tail).
It was a purely emotional response, the kind that I get upset at other people for making when talking about the mosque they want to build or gay marriage or gun violence or any issue that people use to piss each other off.
Hitler is just a buzz word. Which is actually part of my problem with him saying it in such a blithe way. In a weird way, by equating policy disagreements with a genocidal egomaniac, you’re actually disrespecting Hitler. You’re actually bringing his evil down to the level of the mundane, which we should never do. Obama is Hitler because he created a consumer protection agency? C’mon.
So yeah, I kind of lost my shit last night. And to that guy who shouted out “Heil Hitler,” I apologize. There was no reason to meet your idiocy with my own, even though you are a fucking moron.
Anyone who has ever confronted head-on idiocy understands where Black is coming from. There are certain individuals out there who make any attempt at logical or civil discourse you might wish to have with them an impossibility. Gross ignorance is more often than not an impenetrable fortress and a “f**k you” is the only response that makes any sense. In most cases though, it’s a mistake. The better play is to ignore and move on.
Basically it comes down to choosing which wingnut you wish to engage in debate. Many are so far beyond the edge of reason, it’s just not worth the effort.
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(h/t: Mediaite)
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Sometime purging yourself with a good rant can make you feel better, even if it is wrong to do it. The heckler picked the wrong man to heckle that night. Thank you Michael Ian Black for saying what needed to be said.
If I didn’t know better I would think this was a response from LEWIS BLACK, one of my favorite comedians (also a Jew).
This sh*t makes you mad because you don’t know where to start. It is like your 4 year old asking you “Daddy, what is nuclear fusion?” Trying to reason with people like that is impossible 99.9% of the time.
I guess all I would say is what he said in his calm after-response, that hyperbole only makes political discourse into angry verbal masterbation. It is only for the excitation of the one speaking. It lends nothing to the debates of how we solve America’s problems.
I THINK ALOT OF US FEEL THE WAY YOU DO. THEY SAY SWEARING RELEIVES THE STRESS THAT YOU ARE FEELING,AND I AGREE WITH THAT.THANKYOU FOR STANDING UP FOR PRESIDENT OBAMA.HE IS A VERY DECENT MAN AND FOR ANYONE WITH HATE THAT COMPARES HIM TO HITLER OR A WITCH DOCTOR OR A FAMILY OF MONKEY”S IN THE WHITE HOUSE IS JUST PURE HATE AND THEY HAVE NO COMMON DECENCY.AND ITS THE PEOPLE IN THIS COUNTRY,AND THE PEOPLE WHO ARE IN THE MEDIA WHO ENCITE THIS KIND OF ATTITUDE AND BEHAVIOR AND DONT CARE ABOUT WHAT THEY ARE DOING ARE JUST TRASH. MOST OF US HAVE COMMON DECENCY AND KNOW THE PRESIDENT IS DOING WHAT HE CAN AND SHOULD TRY AND DO MORE,BUT CALLING HIM NAMES ISNT GOING TO SOLVE OUR PROBLEMS IS IT…ITS TOO BAD THAT THE GOP DOESNT SEE THAT IF WE WORK TOGETHER TO GET THINGS DONE THIS COUNTRY COULD GET BACK ON ITS FEET,ALL THEY HAVE IN THEIR MINDS ARE GAMES,AND NO ANSWERS AND ARE DISCONNECTED WITH THE PEOPLE WHO NEED HELP IN THIS COUNTRY. A GOLD STAR FOR BRAVERY FOR YOU!
You know what? I don’t think Mr. Black should have any reason to feel bad. Not one bit. Here’s why I think that.
I realize that he didn’t wanna stoop to their level by shouting down some idiotic “Obama is Hitler” moron. But be honest with yourself. Do you honestly believe that the idiot who was shouting “Sig Heil!” wanted to have an open, free, and honest debate with someone like him? Or YOU? A LIBERAL?! Of course not. Had he or you tried, you would’ve understood what it was like for those Congressional Dems last year during the Health Care “debate” (which were nothing more than shouting matches).
The other side, and I’m talking about “the bottom 20%” of this country, don’t want debates. They don’t want honest, open discussions about how to fix things in this country. They KNOW how to fix it! Rush Limbaugh, Glen Beck, Bill O’Reilley, et al told them so. They don’t lead, they follow.
They follow the strong man who works on their fears, not their hopes. They tell them that it’s all the fault of [INSERT SCAPEGOAT HERE]. And that if they just follow them, then all of their problems will go away.
These people don’t listen to folks who tell them that they must take responsibility for their own actions and join forces with the rest of the citizenry in order to help their fellow man. “Hell no!,” the bottom 20%ers say. “What’s in it for ME, ME, ME, ME and ME!!”
The strongman will tell them whatever the want to hear and make them feel oh, so good. But not too good, because the strongman will warn the bottom 20%ers that there is a cancer within. That is, anyone who opposes the strongman. So the 20%ers go after ANYONE who is even vaguely like the OTHER. Support of the strongman is thus turned into support of the people, the nation, the state.
There have been many strongmen over the couse of human events. And nearly ALL of them follow a similar path. Hitler was one of those strongmen. And isn’t it rather funny that the idiotic moron who shouted “Sig Heil!” represents the kind of people in this country who are more like to FOLLOW Hitler than oppose him?
To misquote Shakespeare, “He doth projected much.”
Robert – “They follow the strong man who works on their fears, not their hopes. They tell them that it’s all the fault of [INSERT SCAPEGOAT HERE]. And that if they just follow them, then all of their problems will go away.”
I think its been the dems who used the 8 years of the Bush presidency as a campaign slogan. What’s ironic, is that they’ve gotten us even deeper in debt than Bush ever dreamed of.
And MaryKay, I suppose you never called Bush a name while he was in office.
Tommy … I can only speak for myself and not for MaryKay but I honestly didn’t call Bush names during his eight year reign. I was very critical of many of his policies but I wished the man well. I still wish him well in retirement but I am very happy he is no longer in the oval office.
You’re a better man than me Charlie. I didn’t like him and let everyone around me know it.
I admit it. I called him cruel, demeaning, horrible names and I said them all to my own sweet Mother…
I think she really enjoyed it. :)
i can honestly say that when bush was in office i never called him any names.i had respect for him because he was our president.he did a few good things and i like him as a person.but i feel someplace along the way he lost his way, his version of healthcare for americans wasnt really a great plan.helping the top 3 percent thinking it was going to help the middle and lower class,really now the people who needed help right away had to wait for things to trickle down on them well it wasnt jobs or wealth in any way.,the outsourcing the 2 wars, less regulation,katrina …crash!.plus cheney..a man who didnt have any reguard for any one in the country,only cared about what he wanted to do,from torture to saying he didnt care what the country thought and deficets dont matter,the outing of a cia agent,haliburton back door dealings his buddy scooter in jail,.i can honestly say that the gop for the 8 years they led looked like they only cared about the rich..they havent changed any with what they want to do today,its still the same plan..and im sorry but the top 3 percent is not any small business of any kind and they should really stop using that for an excuse for the bush tax crap.they can make jobs now but they arent doing it their saving their money in over seas bank accounts,buying gold or real estate. real people with real problems need money in their hands now,and for the gop to block any kind of bill for small business loans tax cuts and what ever else the president wants to do is just stupid.mr boehner needs to realize that the $193,000 he makes a year he doesnt deserve because he is not doing anything to help anyone his only concern is the wealthy.i say cut their pay to minimum wage and take away their healthcare maybe then the party of no and hate mongering will get the message,maybe they will then relate to the people who need help and whats going on in this country,and open their eyes and see by them refusing to do any thing decent they are the ones who are out of touch and in denial with that fact. so yes i would fire mr.boehner and the rest of his party before i would fire any one from obama”s admin.they arent blocking anything or playing games.they are trying to get things done.and once again i like bush as a person.and my last comment on him is he said that we shouldnt treat american born muslums as our enemy we should treat them with respect,now his party and his friends are doing alot of fear mongering about muslums and the mosque.he needs to come out and comment on his past words and remind his party that the fear mongering need to stop. before things get out of controll from all the hate thats being said,…peace everyone.
I will admit, yes, I did call Mr. Bush a ton of names during his tenure in office. But here’s the funny thing about it. Bush deserved, im my opinion, to be called those names.
Now grant you, if you had supported Bush’s policies, you probably wouldn’t call him any pajoritive names and you would feel negatively about someone like me calling Bush a “facist” for taking away our civil liberties (thourgh the throughly Orwellian USA Patriot Act) or “war criminal” for lying his butt off to get us into a war with Iraq based on intel he and his minions cooked up, etc.
But be honest with yourself. What precisely did President Obama actually DO in order to deserve to be called, nevermind compared to, Adolf Hitler? Seriously, what exactly did President Obama do to deserve this charge?
Did he strip our civil liberties away through deceit via the USA Patriot Act? No, he didn’t. Bush did. While Obama may technically be continuing its policies, it isn’t being enforced the way it was under Bush (that I know of, I admit).
Is he turning America into a Socialist state? Well, I hate to break it to you, but guess what. When the Social Security Act of 1934 was passed, we officially became a democratic socialist country. And it was a good thing (still is, by the way). After all, President Roosevelt was merely given the choice of bringing a small bit of socialism to prop up the hulking wreak that was this country thanks to unfettered, laise faire capitalism, or do nothing like the Republican Party wanted him to do and see America become a European TOTALITARIAN state. A total economic collapse would’ve undoutedly brought on either Facism or Communism one. But back to the the original question. No, I’m sorry, but expanding the Medicare system to include ALL Americans will not, I repeat NOT, destroy our nation’s identity and institutions anymore than the introduction to Medicaid and Medicare did back in the 60s.
Has President Obama taxed America to death? If you mean ALL AMERICA, then no, he hasn’t. The tax hikes he’s proposing only applies to folks making over $200k per year, with greater emphasis on ending the overseas loopholes corporations enjoyed since President Reagan. At Obama’s worse, he wants to bring taxes back to where they were under President Clinton. You know, back when we were making jobs by the millions and the Dow was sky high – almost as high as the litigation the GOP put under the President and his minions.
So be honest with yourself. What EXACTLY did Obama do to deserve the names, like “Hitler” and “Muslim” and “Socialist”? The only “name” I would call him is “Appeaser” for constantly trying to win over the GOP voters by compromising the legislation the Dems want him to pass. Now I would be more than satisfied in calling him that – as well as compare him to Neville Chamberlin, rather than Adolf Hitler.
Because after all, I find it funny that Obama is both compared to Hitler and at the same time branded either a Communist or a Socialist. After all, when Hitler and the Nazi Party came to power on January 30, 1933, their first targets were NOT the Jews (that really got started with the passage of the Nuremburg Laws in 1934), but the German Socialist and Communist parties as they were banned and outlawed with the ’33 Enabling Act.
The first men and women to die in the Concentration Camps by Hitler’s hand were Socialists and Communists.