Thanks to E.A. Blair for suggesting this wonderful new product...and illustration. We're planning on introducing more of your favorite wingers on Flakies boxes because...well, because every wingnut deserves the recognition.
From The Onion:
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The best of late night political humor via Daniel Kurtzman’s Political Humor.
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John McCain has finally had enough of his Republican teabagging cohorts, Rand Paul and Ted Cruz.
In the latest expression of Republican frustration with conservative GOP colleagues, Sens. John McCain (R-AZ) ...
The Thirteenth Amendment of the United States reads as follows:
Section 1. Neither slavery nor involuntary servitude, except as a punishment for crime whereof the party shall have been duly convicted, shall exist within the United States, or any place subject to their jurisdiction.
Section 2. Congress shall have power to enforce this article by appropriate legislation.
After passing the Senate (1864) and House (1865), the amendment was sent off to all 36 states of the union for ratification. Georgia became the 27th state to ratify the amendment and on December 6 1865, the Thirteenth Amendment was adopted. Slavery was outlawed. Yeah!
But the story did not end there.
After watching Steven Spielberg’s film Lincoln, a professor at the University of Mississippi and his colleague decided to look into the matter. Here’s what they discovered.
Mississippi was one of four states that rejected ratification of the 13th amendment, along with New Jersey, Delaware, and Kentucky. The amendment passed without Mississippi’s support anyway, and all the other no-voting states symbolically ratified the amendment in the following years. New Jersey was quick, ratifying in 1866. Delaware had resolved the matter by 1901. Kentucky took a little longer, waiting until 1976. Mississippi lawmakers finally got around to it in 1995.
But it doesn’t appear to have been a huge priority, because the ratification was never sent to the Office of the Federal Register, which means it wasn’t official.
No worries. The Mississippi Secretary of State was contacted and the paperwork was finally done this month to make ratification of the Thirteenth Amendment official.
With that out of the way, word is out that Mississippi will now get around to surrendering to the union later this month.
Mississippi state Rep. Bubba Carpenter (R) said that it’s OK for women to have coat hanger abortions because it’s for a greater good.
A video obtained by Rachel Maddow’s blog captures Carpenter saying he is proud of Mississippi’s attempts to outlaw abortion outright, despite the fact that the Supreme Court has ruled abortions legal in the United States.
His exact words.
It’s going to be challenged, of course, in the Supreme Court and all — but literally, we stopped abortion in the state of Mississippi, legally, without having to– Roe vs. Wade. So we’ve done that. I was proud of it. The governor signed it into law. And of course, there you have the other side. They’re like, ‘Well, the poor pitiful women that can’t afford to go out of state are just going to start doing them at home with a coat hanger. That’s what we’ve learned over and over and over.’
But hey, you have to have moral values. You have to start somewhere, and that’s what we’ve decided to do. This became law and the governor signed it, and I think for one time, we were first in the nation in the state of Mississippi.
The thinly veiled scam that Mississippi is pulling off here is passing a law they claim puts an end to coat hanger abortions by placing restrictions on which doctors can perform abortions in Mississippi. What the law does in fact is jeopardize the existence of Mississippi’s only abortion clinic thereby leaving women without the means to travel out of state to take matters into their own hands.
The only explanation I can think of on how legislators like Bubba in Mississippi can sleep at night after passing draconian laws that endanger the lives of women is that they’re sociopaths.
And the only explanation I can think of on how people can vote sociopaths like Bubba into office is that they’re a terribly ignorant and backward bunch.
Also, it should be illegal for anyone with the name ‘Bubba’ to enter politics.
Even if you believe in abortion, the hypocrisy of the left that now tried to kill this bill, that says that I should have never signed it, the true hypocrisy is that their one mission in life is to abort children, is to kill children in the womb. It doesn’t really matter, they don’t care if the mother’s life is in jeopardy, that if something goes wrong that a doctor can’t admit them to a local hospital, that he’s not even board certified. We passed that bill and I think you’ll see other states follow and when that happens at least these fly-in abortionists are going to be regulated under the state laws of the Medical Procedures Act here in the state of Mississippi as they should be across the nation.
Who the hell is pro-abortion? No one should waste their time trying to explain to this asshole that there is a difference in being pro-choice as opposed to pro-abortion. He’d never understand.
The march backwards to a time when back alley abortions were a thriving enterprise is alive and well in Mississippi.
With states governments from coast to coast working tirelessly to make sure no woman has sex for pleasure without suffering the consequences of blessed, precious motherhood, it may be tempting to believe that if you have a uterus, the entire country has become hostile territory. Well, we’ve got good news and bad news: The good news is that wherever you are, things could probably be much worse for your ladyparts. Unless, that is, you live in one of the ten scariest places to have ladyparts. The bad news is that these ten places exist.
You’re out of luck if you’re a woman and living in certain cities (I’d say most cities) in Texas, Tennessee, Idaho, Georgia, Oklahoma, Arkansas, Ohio, Kansas, South Dakota…as well as anywhere in ‘lovely’ Mississippi.
Sorry, Magnolia staters. Mississippi is far and away the scariest place to be a woman.
Barring judicial injunction, as of July 1, operations at the state’s only abortion clinic will be threatened because of a new law signed into law by Governor Phil Bryant. Every state that Mississippi touches has a 24-hour waiting period in place for women who want to have abortions, and earlier this year, the House passed a law barring women from receiving prescriptions for RU-486 via Skype or teleconference, so ladies in Mississippi are triply fucked.
The state also leads the nation in teen pregnancy and obesity, and worst in child wellness, but despite all of its problems that aren’t related to women having too many abortions, Mississippi’s legislators have stuck to something they know they can control— whether or not the ladies stay pregnant. They’re surprisingly mum, though, on making sure that the environment for pregnant ladies is devoid of pollutants that could cause birth defects and difficult pregnancies and stuff. Nope, let’s keep everything unregulated but the squishy baby houses.
If you live in Mississippi, you have my sincerest condolences.
The scariest part of all this is how bold the anti-choicers have become in restricting legal abortions in red states…and they’re getting away with it. Read the entire article and find out why “there’s nothing to dance about if you’re a set of fallopian tubes with the misfortune of finding yourself in Pocatello, Idaho.”