The best from Political Humor‘s collection of the week’s late night political humor.
Happy Friday.
“After winning five primaries yesterday, Mitt Romney has his new campaign slogan. ‘Well, I guess you’re stuck with me.’” –Jay Leno
“Romney proves with a little hard work and a little luck, even a multimillionaire white guy from Harvard can succeed in this country.” –Jay Leno
“Yesterday the Dalai Lama said he likes George W. Bush as a person, but not as a president. When asked for comment, Bush said, ‘I love him as a Dalai, but not as a Lama.’” –Conan O’Brien
“Time magazine has come out with their 100 most influential people issue, and Newt Gingrich is not on the list. In fact, he’s not even on the list of the 100 most influential Newts.” –Jay Leno
“It’s Earth Week. So we’re doing tonight’s show with very little energy. We’re using our solar-powered applause sign. Not only that — my hairpiece is 100 percent hemp.” –David Letterman
“President Obama is proposing to keep student loans cheap as a way to appeal to college students. And if that doesn’t work, Obama’s going to resort to his second proposal, ‘free pizza in my room.’” –Conan O’Brien
“Congress is expanding its probe into the Secret Service scandal. Congressmen want to know how this could happen, who was responsible, and do those ladies take Discover cards.” –Conan O’Brien
“They estimate that a billion people participated in Earth Day activities. Then they all went back to driving their SUVs to the gym.” –Jimmy Kimmel
“Mitt Romney has launched a new drive to appeal to Hispanic voters. Unfortunately, his new slogan is ‘Mitt Romney — I probably employ one of your cousins.’” –Conan O’Brien
“Yesterday Mitt Romney won all five of the primaries. Apparently when you buy four primaries, you get the fifth for free.” –Conan O’Brien
“Newt Gingrich still receiving Secret Service protection. What are they protecting him from? Reality?” –Bill Maher
“I think Republicans live in a world now where whatever a liberal says, no matter how sensible, is automatically evil, wrong, and needs to be fought with the fervor of a starving raccoon on crystal meth.” –Bill Maher
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(The George Bush source photograph is a public domain image. )
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Love them all! Since I don’t stay up late enough to watch these guys, I look forward to your Friday Late Night Political Humor posts. :-)