Conservative Stupidity

Conservapedia: Wingnut’s Path To Ignorance

February 27, 2012 By mario piperni

When I’m in need of a chuckle, I point my browser to Conservapedia, the supposedly conservative alternative to Wikipedia. Conservapedia is basically where the far right fringe wackos turn to when they’re in need of ‘encyclopedic’ proof of the lies and bullshit they just heard on Fox News. In short, Conservapedia is to knowledge what the Creationist Museum is to science.

From the Conservapedia entry for 'Barack Hussein Obama'

Anyway, I was doing a Google search for something and accidentally stumbled upon the Conservapedia entry for Barrack Hussein Obama. Not only is it as stupid as stupid gets, it’s hilarious. Here’s the opening paragraph for the entry.

Barack Hussein Obama II also known by the alias Barry Soetoro during his time in Indonesia (born August 4, 1961) is the 44th President of the United States and the controversial recipient of the 2009 Nobel Peace Prize. Overcoming a short political career, Obama defeated Republican nominee John McCain for the presidency in 2008, campaigning on promises of “hope” and “change”. In effect, that change has been an embrace of socialism and liberal policies. Barack Obama has been widely criticized by the American business community and others for his anti-business policies that are killing American jobs during a period of high unemployment. Trend forecaster Gerald Celente indicates that Obama administration’s response to the the failed American economy is more war and the creation of misleading economic statistics.

Can’t you just feel the love? After that, it only gets better. Here’s what they have printed under the sub-heading Early Life.

It has been disputed by some groups whether Obama was actually born in the United States; some people allege that he was born in Kenya. On April 27, 2011 Obama officially released his long form birth certificate, which many experts have determined to be a fake and no legal body has determined its authenticity .

More…

Ayers and Dohrn used their celebrity status among leftists to launch Obama’s career. Ayers, Dohrn and Jeff Jones are authors of Prairie Fire: The Politics of Revolutionary Anti-imperialism, the title taken from The Sayings of Mao Zedong. The book declares “we are communist men and women.” Ayers later jokingly, publicly admitted to ghostwriting Obama’s book, Dreams From My Father and Obama was to appoint several openly avowed Maoists to prominent White House and Executive Branch positions.

And in case you didn’t know…

By Obama’s third year as Commander-in-Chief, over 1200 American troops died in Iraq and Afghanistan – significantly more than the number who died during President George W. Bush’s term of office.

What about those 4100 soldiers who were killed in Iraq while George Bush was Commander-in-Chief, you ask? Shhh…never happened.

Conservapedia likes to brag that it is used as a learning tool for many children in conservative households who are homeschooled. So the next time someone asks you how a child can grow up to become a ~~Rick Santorum~~ an ignorant, misinformed, bigoted, self-righteous moron, now you know.

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Filed Under: Barack Obama, Conservative Stupidity Tagged With: conservapedia

Presidential Nominee Clarence Thomas?

February 27, 2012 By mario piperni

Oh yeah, this is definitely a wonderful idea.

With the Republican presidential nomination still up in the air, the possibility of a brokered convention is looking increasingly likely. Under the party’s rules, the delegates won by Mitt Romney, Rick Santorum, and the others in the primaries and caucuses are obligated to vote for their assigned candidate only on the first ballot. If no candidate wins the required number of votes, the delegates can throw their support to anyone. There’s speculation that party insiders, unhappy with the current field, might float the candidacy of someone not now in the race, like New Jersey Governor Chris Christie or Jeb Bush.

While Christie and Bush might be fine candidates, perhaps the Republicans should consider a more inspired and game-changing pick: Supreme Court Justice Clarence Thomas.

Far-fetched? Maybe. But a Thomas candidacy would energize Republicans in a way that few other Republicans can and would steal tremendous media attention from President Barack Obama.

Has Republican desperation now reached the point where they’re forced to scrape the bottom of the barrel in search of a savior? Clarence Thomas? President?

Funny.

(The source image for this illustration of Supreme Court Justice Clarence Thomas is a photo in the public domain by Steve Petteway and availble via Wikipedia.)
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Filed Under: Conservative Stupidity Tagged With: 2012 Republican primary, supreme court

Insanity 101: Justifying Rape

February 20, 2012 By mario piperni

What the hell is wrong with conservatives and the total maniacal agenda they espouse? Every day brings on a new statement or proposal that goes against everything civilized nations have come to understand as being rational and decent. The latest comes from conservative writer Dana Loesch who pathetically defended a bill which was approved by the Virginia state House requiring any woman seeking an abortion to undergo an ultrasound.

As Dahlia Lithwich noted in a Slate piece, most abortions take place during the first 12 weeks of pregnancy which therefore cancels out women having a typical noninvasive type ultrasound most people are accustomed to. Instead, Virginia women seeking an abortion “will be forced to have a transvaginal procedure, in which a probe is inserted into the vagina, and then moved around until an ultrasound image is produced.”

Short version: Virginia women seeking abortions will be subjected to state-sponsored rape.

And then Dana Loesch offered up this piece of perverted logic in defense of the Virgina bill.

That’s the big thing that progressives are trying to say, that it’s rape and so on and so forth. [...] There were individuals saying, “Oh what about the Virginia rape? The rapes that, the forced rapes of women who are pregnant?” What? Wait a minute, they had no problem having similar to a trans-vaginal procedure when they engaged in the act that resulted in their pregnancy.

Tell me there is not something seriously wrong with anyone (in this case, a woman!) who equates consensual sex with a state-mandated act which involves inserting a probe inside the vagina of a woman who has not requested the procedure. These people have lost their minds.

On the bright side, let the right make this election all about social issues. Let them take their 1950s outlook and argue against abortion, contraception, women’s rights and same-sex marriage. Let their bigotry and narrow-minded hate shine like a beacon for all to see. Polls clearly indicate that the majority of Americans have moved beyond these issues. All that needs to be done is for those progressive attitudes to show themselves in the polls come November.

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Filed Under: Abortion, Conservative Stupidity, Women's Rights Tagged With: rape

President Ron Paul – It’s A Done Deal

September 17, 2011 By mario piperni

Rick, Mitt, Michele and the rest can pack it in now. It’s all over. The long awaited news is out. The great Barry Manilow has thrown his support to Ron Paul.

“I like him. I like what he says, I do. I like what he says. I think he’s solid,” said Manilow, who confirmed to TheDC in an interview at the Capitol on Thursday that he contributed to Paul’s last campaign for president.

“I agree with just about everything he says. What can I tell you?” Manilow added.

Nothing more, Barry. You’ve said it all…as has Ron Paul.

That stuff about Paul wanting to eliminate minimum wage…brilliant strategy to get people working and rejoice over those newly available $1.72/hour jobs. After all, workers in India and Bangladesh get paid a quarter of that and they’re happy.

Same with eliminating the FDA and getting the government out of the business of regulating drugs. Much better idea to hand over that responsibility to the drug companies. Makes perfect sense because you know that big pharma’s only concern is your welfare. Just ask the health insurers. They’ll tell you that no one guards a hen house better than a skulk of foxes.

The Federal Aviation Administration? Worthless, money-gobbling bureaucracy. Paul understands that air safety and your life is best managed by an altruistic private sector.

U.S Department of Education? Gone.

U.S. Department of Energy? Gone.

U.S. Department of Commerce? Gone.

U.S. Department of Health and Human Services? Gone.

U.S. Department of Homeland Security? Gone.

Federal Emergency Management Agency? Gone.

Internal Revenue Service? Gone.

In Ron Paul’s finely tuned analysis, all of the above are “unnecessary bureaucracies” and Barry Manilow agrees. That’s all anyone needs to know.

Here’s the bottom line: when a presidential candidate has the support of a man who not only writes music but is Music, for crying out loud…and writes the songs that make the whole world sing, as well as songs of love and special things, to say nothing of songs which make young girls cry, what more do they need?

Nothing. Absolutely nothing.

Take it away, Barry!

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Filed Under: Conservative Stupidity Tagged With: Barry Manilow, music, republican primary, Ron Paul

Rush Limbaugh as Constitutional Scholar

October 20, 2010 By mario piperni

First Amendment:

“Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof;…”

Christine O’Donnell / Chris Coons debate:

“Where in the Constitution is the separation of church and state?” O’Donnell asked him.

When Coons responded that the First Amendment bars Congress from making laws respecting the establishment of religion, O’Donnell asked: “You’re telling me that’s in the First Amendment?”

Rush Limbaugh:

“Are you telling me separation of church and state’s in the First Amendment? It’s not. Christine O’Donnell was absolutely correct — the First Amendment says absolutely nothing about the separation of church and state.”

“This is a modern and incorrect description of the prohibition of the establishment of a national religion.”

“And the left has taken this to say that religious people can not be in government. And that you can’t teach something like creation in the schools while you can teach evolution because evolution isn’t religion but creationism is. Intelligent design can’t be taught because that’s a religion, evolution is. Yet both require faith because neither can be proved.”

“Separation of church and state is not in the Constitution, and the fact that people laughed about this is what’s really scary.”

No, what’s really scary is that Limbaugh has 20 million listeners who hang on to his every lie.

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Filed Under: Conservative Stupidity, constitution Tagged With: church and state, limbaugh, o'donnell, political issues