
Kurtzman highlights Leno’s best political jokes over the last 17 years.
“The $10 million Clinton is getting for his book beats the old record of $8.5 million paid to the Pope. How do you think this makes the Pope feel? The man dedicates his life to the 10 Commandments, he gets 8.5. Clinton breaks every one of them, he gets 10.” –Jay Leno
“Just like Clinton, the book will come with a jacket and no pants.” –Jay Leno
“Barack Obama’s daughters are very smart. They told him they will take the same responsibility for the dog that he is taking for the economy. That way, if the dog leaves a mess in the White House, it’ll be cleaned up by future generations.” –Jay Leno
“Today, President Barack Obama promised to ‘detect and pursue’ American tax evaders, as opposed to his first 100 days, in which he detected and nominated American tax evaders.” –Jay Leno
Ok, enough of that…let’s get to the good stuff.
“An aide to the prime minister of Canada called President Bush a moron. Well that’s not fair. Here’s a guy who never worked a day in his life, got rich off his Dad’s money, lost the popular vote and ended up president. That’s not a moron, that’s genius!” –Jay Leno
“Plans were announced to raise $300 million for the George W. Bush Presidential Library. $300 million. That’s almost $150 million per book.” –Jay Leno
“President Bush threw out the first ball the other night at the Washington Nationals home opener. Boy, wasn’t is nice to see Bush throwing out something other than the Constitution?” –Jay Leno
“George W. Bush has been invoking a lot of Bible imagery. He said Jesus also had 20 missing years and never held a job he couldn’t get through his dad.” –Jay Leno
“Bush is smart. I don’t think that Bush will ever be impeached, ’cause unlike Clinton, Reagan, or even his father, George W. is immune from scandal. Because, if George W. testifies that he had no idea what was going on, wouldn’t you believe him?” –Jay Leno
“Did you know, when President Bush is in Australia, his approval rating goes down the drain counter-clockwise.” –Jay Leno
There’s a lot more…here’s my favorite…
“President Bush said catching a 7.5 pound fish was his best moment since becoming president. You know the sad thing, a lot of historians would agree with that.” –Jay Leno
More truth than joke in that last one.
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